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03/14/2005: "Half of a whole?"
Since I've been back home in Ohio for spring break, my day has had less to do with the internet and more to do with trying to nap while a chihuaua chews my hair.
My blog entries rarely venture into the philosophical, thought-provoking arena, but I've been thinking about people in my life - friends, family, people I don't know who decide to tell me their life story - and I don't think I like what I see. So many people seem to have this notion that until we are part of a relationship with a Special Someone, we are floundering in this meaningless existence because we don't have someone to share everything with. There seems to be this universal idea that once we find a person who does this Magical Thing, such as being willing to commit, we will suddenly be happy when we weren't before.
The thing is, this is bullshit. We are not half of some whole. We are not missing a part of ourselves when we are single. You are YOU, and you have every little piece and bit of you no matter what your relationship status is, or how well your relationship is going. Instead of desperately looking for that Other Person to make you happy, or to make your day more meaningful, everyone needs to wake up and realize that each one of us has the power to make our own days meaningful, and the power to make ourselves happy. Chances are, if you're unhappy, simply finding some guy who says, "I'll be your boyfriend" isn't going to make you happy in the long run. If you're miserable because you feel like you're floundering in singledom and life just isn't fulfilling, chances are life isn't going to be fulfilling with someone either. In each of those "meaningless" single days, there is someone there to appreciate the day - yourself. Your entire self, not some half of a whole. If you're looking for That One Person to be with who will Make You Happy, chances are, until you look for him or her in the mirror, you're not going to find That Person.
Society and those goddamn chick flick movies perpetuate the idea that we must look for happiness in other people. I was so satisfied when the final episode of Sex and the City carried (no pun intended) the message that your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship in your life, and that once you've found yourself and learned to love you, then you can worry about other people loving you. So join me saying, "Screw this 'he's my other half' bullshit!" Recognize that you're YOU, and not some jigsaw puzzle piece. Each relationship is built with two, whole people who are fully responsible for making their own happiness and for making the most of their life. At the end of the day, when you emerge from the bank vault and find that the world has been destroyed by nuclear bombs, the only person you have left is yourself, and you need to be able to be happy with that.
Unless your glasses break just as you find the library. Then you have my permission to be miserable.
(Wondering how many people will get that pop culture reference)
Replies: 2 Comments
Yay for The Twilight Zone! :)Little Willow, Monday, March 21st
I think you need to write more philisophical things more often. ;-)Shannon, Sunday, March 27th